Embracing Weakness

I'm thinking about the VOLUNTARY WEAKNESS that Bob Sorge's book talks about. He credits Mike Bickle for his insights about that, so I read Bickle's explanation of weakness from his David book. He says:
There is a difference between the introductory grace and anointing of God that come to us at salvation, and the greater realms that God gives those who take the kingdom by force, who press in to his heart with a vision for the fullness of God’s power.
, The introductory dimensions are automatic. All you do is show up and say, “Yes,” and you get forgiven. You can read the Word and get revelation. You’ll feel a little bit of God’s presence, which is an introductory anointing for ministry.
. But never should we limit our vision to that which is given freely and is automatic.
. To enter into the greater realms takes a fierce determination. You enter by WEAKNESS, meaning not sinfulness, but a lifestyle of fasting, prayer, serving, and bearing up under persecution.
. Weakness? Yes.
. When you invest your time and energy in prayer, you are forfeiting hours and energy you could be using to build a ministry or business or lifestyle in some other way.
. Fasting too is about weakness. You are giving away your physical strength.
. Giving your money is embracing weakness by giving away your time and energy.
. Persecution is the same thing. Instead of getting your own vengeance, you silently bear under it, rejoicing in the Lord.
Those are the four main ways in which weakness is described in 2 Corinthians 11-12 and throughout the Word of God.
. The message of weakness is offensive to the church. Most ministries end up believing the lie that there is more power by spending your time doing the works of the kingdom instead of taking some of that time and pouring it into the presence of God. They measure in the here and now.
. But in the big picture of church history, when people have persistently fasted and prayed and given their money and borne the stigma of the anointing, God has always proved true by releasing power in a greater dimension. It may take years, but it happens, without exception.
To be honest, I'm good with the prayer and fasting and giving, and I certainly like the IDEA of the anointing, but I'm wondering about the persecution part of the "stigma of the anointing." It's hard for me to volunteer for persecution. I thought I was ready for suffering years ago, but when I experienced some, it nearly killed me.
However, I know there's grace for it. Bob Sorge says, "Those who embrace voluntary weakness have personal ownership of this great principle: My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness. When we embrace weakness, his grace rushes in to strengthen us."
Come to think of it, there was enough grace for my suffering, too. I'm just not as glib about saying that I'm ready for hard stuff anymore. Madeline died six years ago this week, and I still miss her. As I was writing this, Jody emailed and said he still missed her, too. He said, "Having little Charlie helps, but he’ll never replace my baby girl." I know what you mean, Jody.